The tragic side effect of rampant HGH abuse: terrible, terrible movie sequels.

In the biggest surprise since finding out your girlfriend has a penis, Sylvester Stallone has announced his next chapter in the “John Rambo” saga, and it has gotten worse. It has tentatively been called “Rambo 5: The Savage Hunt”… 

“John Rambo could track anyone – or anything – on earth. Now the military desperately needs him for a mission that his ultrasensitive instincts tell him he should refuse. A beast is loose somewhere north of the Arctic Circle. It has already decimated a secret research facility and annihilated a squad of elite military guards. And the raging creature is headed south toward civilization, ready to wreak bloody devastation.

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Best. Review. Ever.

[via Buzzfeed]

I didn’t know they made Rated-R (aka Red Band) Previews… I just thought they were Christian Louboutin, like Julie Benz’s shoes (0:47) in the trailer. Uh… no homo.

BTW- that’s the girlfriend from Dexter!

[via Trailer Addict]